Went and saw “War of the Worlds” today. Find myself liking Tom Cruise in just about everything he’s in… despite myself. So what if he thinks there are evil aliens hiding in volcanoes, or whatever.

Made the mistake of seeing the movie at the local movie theatre, instead of driving half an hour “down the hill” to the bigger place. My wife and I avoid seeing movies in town because…

Well, because of times like today. Everyone — everyone! around us insisted on talking like we were in their living room. And of course, when a polite “shh, please,” is issued by myself, I get a look like I’ve done just about the rudest thing imaginable.

The guy in front of us, super loud, said, “Hey, Morgan Freeman!” during the intro and outro voice overs. I wanted to kick the back of his head. Instead, I leaned over toward him and said at his ear, “Hey, what do you know, Morgan Freeman did the narration!”

No one picked up their trash.

No one stayed through the credits.

By the time the lights came up and people were getting out of their seats, I felt compelled to say, loudly, “Does everyone in this fucking town think they’re the only people in the room when they go to fucking movies???”

Then… then!!! Walking out to the car, some spiky-haired teenaged future general contractor almost plowed directly into my wife. He just kept talking on his cell phone. I don’t know if I could have taken him, honestly, but I was so pissed off at the shithole I live in at that point that I was willing to try.

That was not to be, however, since… ultimate insult to injury… a fucking godseller made a bee-line for us, pamphlet in hand, and started to ask me, “Hello sir, are you having a good day?”

“I’m having a good enough day that I don’t want to talk to you,” I said. I held up my hand. I’m not a person prone to violence, but if he’d come any closer I would have used that hand to push him onto the pavement.

Fucking town. I don’t mind living here. It’s the people I hate. A couple nights ago, at dinner after seeing the “Fantastic Four” (stinko!), I overheard a young man patiently explaining to his girlfriend how Israel came to be. Quote: “After WWII, when the Hebes were practically exterminated by Hitler, America looked around and said, ‘what are we going to do with all these Hebes that don’t have a place to live?’ So we stuck ‘em in Israel.”

He later made a comment to the effect that he didn’t understand how Germany could be made to go along with Hitler. Hmmm… how about making the casual dehumanization of a culture socially acceptable, eh, redneck?

Yes, I see the double irony. Get off my back.

Fucking town. So many NASCAR lovin’, flag-wavin’, pro-life, christian, white, talk-radio-listening, perpetual sunburned, cologne-wearing, monocultured assholes!

Sigh. Did I mention that I still notice the funny looks my Asian wife and I get when we go to resturaunts, now and then?

Oh well. I sold out to get here, essentially. My house has doubled in value in three years. All it cost was my mortal soul.

Fuck.

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