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Second “Sister”

Words: 02-14-16-2001
Music: 02-14-16-2001

What’s It All About?

This was written thinking about my old high-school girlfriend. She and I had a relationship that, as I remember it, was even more tumultuous and full of drama than most at that age. It wasn’t until twenty years later that we finally understood: our continual crises weren’t thanks to my melodramatic nature, her abusive father, or her own self destructive tendencies. Well, not entirely. Turns out she’s also had a form of schizophrenia that wasn’t diagnosed until late in her thirties.

Damn, that explained a lot.

The Sonic Youth song “Schizophrenia” always reminded me of her, so this is a kind of thematic sequel to that tune. Toward the end of my time with Running Erin, we played it, but I don’t have any recordings of us doing it. The version here was recorded solo, acoustic guitar and vocals, direct to hard drive. No effects or overdubs.

Lyrics:

“Second ‘Sister’” by Matthew Wayne Selznick

Can you train your sadness
Optimize reluctance
Go on record baby
Stand behind
Your mind

Do you hold surprises
As you dodge inquiries
Open letters waiting
Who knows what
You’ll find?

I went down to
Meet a friend
‘Til his sister came over
Blew my mind again

Can you find the answer
Sanity relapser
Go out on a limb
That’s where
I am
All of the time
So pay it no mind
Stand by your mind

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I Should Probably Put A Set Together

Not to mention start practicing.

I haven’t played publicly since April of 2003 — it’s been a year. This isn’t the first time I’ve taken time off from performing, but this may have been the longest time, and certainly the most spiritually and creatively cleansing. So I want to ease into this performing thing, something low-key, low-consequence…

That sounds like Borders.

I just booked four gigs at four different Borders stores in May. These are free gigs — well, I get to keep whatever tips the customers deign to give me — but I don’t mind all that much right now. I’m hoping to make recordings of all of them, from which I can cull the best for another release, and plus, it’s a comfortable place to get my groove back on. Assuming it still fits.

I still have to get performance agreements signed, but the tentative schedule is like so:

Friday, May 9th, 2004: Borders La Habra
Saturday, May 15th, 2004: Borders Montclair
Saturday, May 22nd, 2004: Borders Brea
Saturday, May 28th, 2004: Borders City of Industry.

All shows should be around 7:30 or so until 9:30 or so in the evening.

If you’d like to know more about each show as they get closer, send me an email at gigannounce@mwsmedia.com. That’ll put you on the MWS Media mailing list — periodic blasts all about the man who put the MWS in Music Weans Salivation… me.

Fairly productive day, wot. Put up the magazine, got some gigs… also fixed the network situation for optimum convenience for all concerned here at home… it’s nine o’clock, I have to be at work in thirteen hours, and I have more I want to do before I sleep…