You can check out the first four songs, too! “Torn Apart,” “The Worried Days,” “Lily Hand Mantra” and “Song for Paul Westerberg.”

The purpose of the Bookcase Sessions is to figure out which of these twenty five or so songs will make the cut on “Keyhole.” I’m counting on you to help me figure that out by rating, commenting on, favoriting and sharing these videos on YouTube. Please do so for “Spirit-Poor!”

“Spirit-Poor” was written on January 5, 2009.

Again, this crowdsourced experiment depends on your participation, so please be so kind as to rate and comment on the video at YouTube, and if you really like it, add it to your favorites and share it around.

This Bookcase Session is for Alex Chilton, with all the thanks in the world.

She’s also a crazy-talented author and columnist — in fact, writing is how she pays the bills.

Writing is also something that’s very freakin’ hard to do when you have a broken molar sending throbbing, continuous pain through the side of your face.

That’s what Nikol has been dealing with for weeks, now… and like so many indie creative folks, she has no health insurance to take care of it.

It’s a potentially devastating loop: no money to fix painful, broken tooth. Pain makes it hard to concentrate and really messes with a person’s funny. No concentration and no funny makes it hard to write. No writing, no money . No money, painful broken tooth remains painfully broken.

You can help Nikol take care of her tooth. If a couple hundred of you parted with just $10.00 or more, she could get this done right away and get back to making smart, funny stuff.

So, c’mon! Give what you can, and do it right now — don’t wait! If you wait, you’re literally prolonging the pain, and that’s just not nice.

Thank you for your generosity… and be sure to spread the word! Share this link with everyone you think would like to help:
http://mwsmedia.chipin.com/nikol-haslers-dental-bill

I grabbed a beer, headed into my office, switched on the microphone and joined Chris, co-host Kris Johnson and fellow guest Thomas “Cmdln” Gideon for a great discussion on “Free,” neo-patronage and the state of podcast fiction. This was a few days before I wrote my blog post on the subject, and spending time with these gentlemen really helped focus my thoughts.

Now you can listen to our meeting of the minds! And heck, don’t stop there — be sure to subscribe to The Secret Lair in iTunes or the podcast client of your choice!

I’ve been
welling up
flowing up
for years
and
only
need
you

to spill
to rush

go ahead
you
won’t empty
me

there’s enough
so
much
more
than enough
to fill

us

both

come here

open up

]]> http://www.mattselznick.com/scribtotum/2010/03/08/ready/feed/ 0 http://www.mattselznick.com/scribtotum/2010/03/07/like-an-invitation/ http://www.mattselznick.com/scribtotum/2010/03/07/like-an-invitation/#comments Mon, 08 Mar 2010 04:25:53 +0000 Matt http://www.mattselznick.com/?p=3047 I’ve been thinking about Kris Shine today.

Kris co-founded PIGBAT with me and Jon Strunk. PIGBAT was the power trio I played bass and sang with in the early nineties. Kris co-wrote “1991,” one of my more popular songs, for what that’s worth.

PIGBAT was over by 1995.

Kris died in a car crash in 2001.

He’s on my mind today… probably because over the last few days I’ve been watching rock documentaries including “Not A Photograph: The Mission of Burma Story,” “X: The Unheard Music,” and “We Jam Econo: The Story of the Minutemen.”

That last one, especially, pulled Kris back to the forefront of my heart. While Kris and I didn’t know each other nearly as long as Mike Watt knew D. Boon and we didn’t grow up together, he was my close friend. Together, we made the most important music of my life so far. And I miss him. I remember the music he loved and loved to play, and I wonder what kind of music Kris would be making today.

And I wonder what kind of music I’ll be making next.

Today I took my bass — a 1972 Gibson Ripper that I’ve played for nearly twenty years and which has seen better days due to an act of vandalism and just plain being nearly as old as I am — into the groovy local music shop to have it overhauled and cleaned up. I’ll find out tomorrow just how much it’s going to cost, but pretty much any price is worth it because this is the first step on my path to making music in a band again.

I figured that out today, you see. There was no epiphany, nor did I spend much time brooding on it. I just knew. I need to start another band, and in that band, I need to be writing songs, playing bass and singing.

Why “need?” Well, gentle reader, why do I need to do anything creative? Because to not do so is to be less myself, and these days I’m all about being as much myself as I possibly can.

I’m not a spiritual person, per se, but Kris being so strongly in my thoughts today feels like a kind of validation of this need. I think Kris would be sporting that wide grin of his if he knew I was itching to get going again.

There’s a vision in my head, kinda fuzzy but getting clearer the more I think about it, of what this band will be like. I’ll write more about it as I get a little ways farther along. For now, I just wanted to mention it, and acknowledge my friend.

• Podcasting fiction is one of many tools an author can employ in the promotion and marketing of their book, other works and their personal brand. It’s not a silver bullet; it’s not a sure thing, and I’ve never represented it as such.
• I was part of the first big wave of podcasters, and I was part of the first wave of authors who podcast their fiction. This does not make me an authority, standard bearer, or “god” of podcasting, as some have labeled me. There are plenty of far more active podcasters people can point to… for heck’s sake, I haven’t posted a podcast episode of original material in almost a year,and I’ve only ever podcast two of my works of fiction to date. Do I have my place in the history of the medium? Arguably a small one, yes… but let’s not make more of it than it is, m’kay?
• I believe in neo-patronage and the power of “Free.” I also recognize that neo-patronage has yet to be widely adopted and may never be — it requires a philosophical buy-in from the audience that has yet to happen. Similarly, I know the use of various “Free” models in one’s marketing is not a guarantee of commercial success.
• I’m constantly re-evaluating my methods, refining my approach to creativity and the marketing of my creative endeavors, and trying new things. I’m not a fundamentalist in anything — that’s the path to stagnation, and that doesn’t appeal to me in the slightest.
• Just as there is more than one story and more than one way to tell those stories, there is no right way to do any of this stuff. Throw things at the wall. See what sticks, but don’t expect it to stick forever — I sure don’t!

This is pretty much what I’ve always thought and how I’ve always approached my creative endeavors: keep making things, keep being creative, keep trying new methods.

Just look at the the last twenty years of my life:

• I’ve done a print litzine, a collaborative serial fiction shared-world webzine and a themed short fiction webzine.
• I’ve been in two bands, two acoustic duos and performed as a solo artist at scores of venues large and small.
• I sold a novel and two short stories, self-published three short stories and a novel (the same novel) and created an ongoing serial fiction project.
• I’ve released five CDs and dozens of individual songs.
• Oh, and I was a pioneering podcaster and podcasting author, and I’ve performed as a voice actor and dramatic reader for dozens of podcasts, podcast novels, audio books and, most recently, a movie.

Some of these things were disappointing failures. Some of the successes surprised the hell out of me. That doesn’t mean I’ll never again do anything like the things that failed, or that I’ll keep doing the things that succeeded. I just keep making things, and meanwhile the world turns.

As for my dear friend J. C. Hutchins, I celebrate his decision to focus his time, energy and resources on the things that, right now at least, have a better chance of helping him reach his creative goals. His choice is his choice, and it works for him.

If you’re an aspiring author considering podcasting their work, don’t let one guy’s decision give you pause… just keep your perspective, keep your head out of the clouds, avoid tiger trap shortcuts, watch your ego, and don’t think it stops… or starts… with this one thing. A carpenter doesn’t build a house using just a hammer, y’know?

All right. Are we done here?

The purpose of the Bookcase Sessions is to determine which of these twenty five or so songs will make the cut on “Keyhole.” I’m counting on you to help me figure that out by rating, commenting on, favoriting and sharing these videos on YouTube. Please do so for “Song For Paul Westerberg!”

“Song For Paul Westerberg” was written on August 12, 1992.

Again, this little crowdsourced vetting experiment depends on your participation, so please be so kind as to rate and comment on the video at YouTube, and if you really like it, add it to your favorites and share it around.

The Boom Effect

Over a month ago, I wrote about the sudden, unexpected death of my friend Tee Morris’ wife. Not only did this leave Tee a widow… it also left his very young daughter, who for privacy reasons we all call Sonic Boom, without a mother.

There’s nothing we, as friends, can do to replace the gap in Sonic Boom’s heart left by the loss of her mom. Instead, many of us have banded together to try and make Tee’s daughter’s future a little more bright by raising money for a trust fund in her name. The Boom Effect is an online auction event to that end.

Items From Me Up For Bid In The Boom Effect Auction

I’ve donated two things for the auction block.

Notes and Lyrics Sheets From “Anyman: The John Smith E.P.”

Last year, author J. C. Hutchins and I collaborated on a transmedia promotional project wherein we co-wrote several songs that I performed and recorded “in character” as John Smith, the protagonist from Hutchins’ book “7th Son: Descent.” These songs are now available as “Anyman: The John Smith E.P.” in CD or high quality digital format from Amazon.com, iTunes and other online retailers.

There are twenty sheets, mostly handwritten, of lyrics, notes and brainstorming generated during the months that I took our ideas and turned them into actual songs. J. C. Hutchins and I have autographed each one, and now these original, one-of-a-kind artifacts of the “Anyman” project can be yours… if you place the winning bid on Saturday, February 27, 2010!

Out of Print, Very Rare Original MWS Media Edition of “Brave Men Run – A Novel of the Sovereign Era”

Before Swarm Press came out with the very pretty “small press” edition of my first book, “Brave Men Run – A Novel of the Sovereign Era,” I self-published the paperback in 2005 through my own MWS Media imprint. This version of the book was printed and distributed through Lulu.com and featured the (in)famous orange “homunculus” clip-art cover.

This original edition went out of print forever in July of 2008, and as of this writing a used copy will set you back as much as $180.00 on Amazon.com. For the Boom Effect auction, I’ve donated a brand new copy that I will personalize and autograph for the winning bidder — making this not only a rare book, but a one-of-a-kind collector’s edition, too! Submit the winning bid and make it yours!

Participate In The Boom Effect Auction

The Boom Effect auction takes place on Saturday, February 27, 2010 beginning at 10 AM Eastern Time / 7 AM Pacific Time over streaming video via uStream.tv. Each hour will feature different types of lots — as I write this, there are nearly a hundred different items and services up for bid! For full details, check out the information for bidders. If you don’t think you can make the event itself, you can place proxy bids as late as 10am Eastern Time on the Friday, February 26, 2010.

I’ll be there — I hope you will be, too. It’s a great cause.

When I performed, I worked my ass off. All the same… I was, as the kids today like to say, Doing It Wrong.

Why would I say so? I’ll tell ya.

• I played mostly originals, which resulted in being ignored or irritating the folks who wanted to hear covers that could soak into one ear and drain out the other while cleanly slipping past their brains.
• When I did play covers, I didn’t play anything anyone knew. Examples:
  • Instead of Neil Young’s “Heart of Gold” I’d play his “Powderfinger”
  • Instead of Bob Dylan’s “Knocking on Heaven’s Door” (which I dropped from the repertoire when Guns ‘n’ Roses picked it up) or “Blowin’ In the Wind” I’d play “Positively 4th Street” if I played an Dylan at all. I was more likely to play Leonard Cohen, really… and not (usually) freakin’ “Hallelujah.” “Famous Blue Raincoat,” baby.
  • Acoustic versions of decidedly non-acoustic songs like Madonna’s “Like A Prayer” or Judas Priest’s “Breakin’ the Law.”
  • Likewise unpopular (to most) punk and post-punk tunes from X, the Blasters, the Replacements, Joy Division and so on.
• I didn’t get paid. Well, almost never. Sometimes it was free coffee and tips… I might leave with fifty bucks; more often I left with less than I brought in and a sore stomach from too much caffeine and not enough food.

Playing in coffeehouses can really, really suck. Sometimes you’re competing with coffee grinders, milk steamers and blenders. Sometimes you’re competing with the clientele: I once pissed off a table of ten people because my being there, sweating and singing my heart out, disturbed the fucking-can-you-believe-it “Magic: The Gathering” card game they were playing. That was extreme. Usually it’s just folks who would rather study or talk to each other than listen to you.

And yet, despite Doing It Wrong, despite the apathetic and sometimes hostile audience… I’m gonna be doing it again. Because I like playing music and it’s been too long since I’ve regularly done so in front of an audience.

Since, as we have established, playing coffeehouses can really, really suck, I plan on offsetting it with shows at your house, because you, dear reader, are, like, the opposite of suck.

Yeah… your house! If you’re within one hundred miles of zip code 92345 and can get me at least a hundred and fifty bucks, I’ll do two forty five minute sets in your living room. I’ll throw in high-quality MP3 downloads of the original music I perform there for every one of your guests who wants to give me an e-mail address.

If your house is farther away from me than one hundred miles, let’s work something out — it’ll probably involve food and lodging and a little more monetary compensation. We can talk about it. Or, for a hundred and fifty bucks, I’ll do a private virtual concert via the Interwebs that will be exclusive to up to twenty people — same deal, MP3s included.

Honestly, though, I’d rather play for you and as many people as you can squeeze into your living room, in person.

So let’s do that!

Meanwhile, tomorrow I’m calling the local coffeehouse about one of those potentially awful gigs because they invited me to do so.

Rawkin’!

It’s been about two months since my marriage ended in all the ways that matter. It’s been rough, and the complicated, unavoidable and stressful stuff isn’t exactly over. That’s adult swim; so be it. On the other hand, I’m more myself than I’ve been since the turn of the century, and becoming even more me. Believe me, it’s not all bad.

So there’s the capsule update. I’m not here to talk about that, though.

Women Included

All of my adult life, most of my closest friends have been women. For the sake of the two women I married, I let some of those friendships lapse. Some, including a woman I once counted as one of the three great loves of my life, I starved with deliberate neglect or damaged, probably beyond repair. I feel the void left behind.

A lesson I’ve finally learned; something the last twenty years has taught me: I’m not making that sacrifice again. When I eventually enter into a relationship with someone, they’ll have to understand that most of the people in permanent residence in my heart are female, and I’m not asking them to move out. These women are not competition to a new love — on the contrary, their insight and our shared history are part of who I am.

I have been diminished — less my true self — without them in my life.

If you want to know me, future love, you want to know them.

It’s true that my past with most of these women is complex. In almost every case, some degree of physical intimacy is part of our history. Some of us have been through some heavy shit together. Many of these women have seen me at my worst, and in some cases, I, them… and they’re still around.

Who wouldn’t want that level of understanding with one’s friends?

Now, in addition to reviving and strengthening the existing connections, I’m getting to know a handful of amazing women who are becoming, it seems, new friends. Old and new, these friendships have been very important to my healing this winter.

This One’s For the Ladies…

My friends, your laughter, wisdom, warmth and generosity of spirit fill up my heart. Your friendship reminds me to simply be. Your beauty inspires me. I see my potential reflected in your smile, and I feel my worth in the steady strength of your embrace.

Damn, you women are awesome. Thank you. I love you.